Top Ten Things You Really Shouldn’t Say in Church

I had written the following for the intro to my message this past Sunday, "The Last Word on the Church," from Revelation 2-3. However, I dropped it to make room for a prayer and musical tribute to fathers. But I can still share it here. So here it is: the “Top Ten Things You Really Shouldn’t Say in Church.”

10. “Is this a good place to pick up chicks?”

9. “Can we please sing Hymn #666?”

8. “Pardon me, is this seat SAVED?”

7. “Teach the middle school boys’ Bible study? Sounds like fun!”

6. “Hey, those crackers and juice were good. Can I get seconds?”

5. “If you happen to see a five-foot-long snake somewhere in here, it’s mine.”

4. “Dude, your comb-over really needs to go.”

3. “If you can’t say something nice about a person, come sit next to me.”

2. “Wow, your baby’s really ugly.’

And, the number one thing you really shouldn’t say in church…

1. All the stuff we had to edit out of this list.